Feng Shuing Your Lovelife

Is your lovelife in high spirits? Would you like to make it colorfully better? Every loving couple comes through some low ebb in their lovelife. That’s when "the bedroom" is not the warm and amusing room as it should be. Different reasons may cause this to happen but there are some undemanding things you can do to rally around to make things better.

Your bedroom operates as a magnet both literally and figuratively for your affairs. It is also where you have a lie-down during the night replenishing your energy levels for the challenges of the next day. It is probably where your passionate life is centered - unless you like to try out - maybe you're a maverick who likes to commune with the outdoors. Your bedroom is your heavenly haven and your homes sanctuary.

The design and layout within it plays a substantial role not only on your passion and romance chances but also your health, wealth and other relationships in general. Conscientious vigilance should definitely be paid on this very important room. When you get it right, positive energy (called "chi" by the Chinese and "ki" by the Japenese) will flow easily through your home.

All things in life are connected at the minute quantum level and the following details will help direct you so you and your dealings will thrive:

• Ensure that your bedroom "feels" welcoming. It must accomplish the role of a safe retreat for you. What goes your bedroom say about you and your personality? Does it say "I'm at home with myself" or is it a big mess and frenzy? Is it just functional - it's purpose is only for resting in your eyes? If so, then it has got to change together with your lovelife.
• Maintain only those items – furnitures/trinkets/gadgets/equipments/accessories – which have fond/loving/good memories. Are there any old flames "hanging around" - again, chuck them out - you do want to move on to a new relationship - don't you? Items holding bad memories also hold residual energy that remind your non-conscious mind.
• Keep your bed as the focal point of the room - where both "action" and "inaction" takes place, where you are both animated and renewed. Does your bedroom have a "personality problem"? Is it in effect multitasking? Do you have a home office or perhaps a treadmill beside you? Again, these items should not be here. You want to focus on your relationships rather than your body or mind in this room - move them out. If this is not possible due to space constraints, you will need to use a screen to keep them "at bay".
• That ubiquitous TV set. Yes it can be cozy to curl up in bed and watch a great movie but a TV sends out a stream of positive ions (rather than positive chi) - this device is "yang" in nature and will ensure your body does not get the rest it requires. It also represents a 3rd party in the room - not particularly conducive to a stable and healthy monogomous relationship... Once again - the TV has got to go.
• Make sure your bed is as far away from the door. If you cannot see the door, you will feel anxious at a subconscious level - this is because you can’t figure out any intruder (heaven forbids!). This uneasiness will affect how you rest at night.
• Select a bed which has a solid and sturdy headboard. In Form School Feng Shui, the headboard represents a supportive mountain to your back.
• Your bed cleaves to some residual energy from those who have come and gone before. Ideally, if you have had a partner and wish to attract a new one, you should buy a new bed. This offers you and your new relationship an best possible chance to grow. In any case, you should invest in the finest bed you can as if you sleep 8 hours per day, this means you will spend 1/3 of your entire life in it!

Read Also

• Functionally Dysfunctional (lifehack.org)
• Why You Can't Keep Your Foot Out of Your Mouth (wired.com)

Quotes for Success and Greatness – The Michael Jordan Way

The greatest basketball player of all time comes up with words of wisdom and inspiration – his moves on the court extends to his verbal airness. It’s just about time that he shares his thoughts, beliefs and attitudes to everyone who looks up to his feats with inspired awe. Here are some of his assertions that we ought to learn from:

1. "I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying."
2. "I've always believed that if you put in the work, the results will come. I don't do things half-heartedly. Because I know if I do, then I can expect half-hearted results."
3. "I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed."
4. "If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome."
5. "Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen."
6. "If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it."
7. "If you're trying to achieve, there will be roadblocks. I've had them; everybody has had them. But obstacles don't have to stop you."
8. "My attitude is that if you push me towards something that you think is a weakness, then I will turn that perceived weakness into a strength."
9. "Failure always made me try harder next time."
10. "I realized that if I was going to achieve anything in life I had to be aggressive. I had to get out there and go for it."
11. "To be successful you have to be selfish, or else you never achieve. And once you get to your highest level, then you have to be unselfish. Stay reachable. Stay in touch. Don't isolate."
12. "I just feel that my competitive drive is far greater than anyone else that I've met and I think that I thrive on that. I think that is my biggest motivation in life -- to compete, find different competitions in certain things in life and try to overcome that, be it positive or negative."
13. "If you put forth the effort, good things will be bestowed upon you. That's truly about the game, and in some ways that's about life too."
14. "Always turn a negative situation into a positive situation."

These fourteen brilliant, inspirational quotes should touch our lives and motivate our thoughts. With the right mind-set and values on life, anything is promising and achievable. The above Michael Jordan quotes just go to establish that.

LET HIM LOVE YOU, LET HIM BE HIMSELF

Attention Women: Even expressively strong single men yearn for guarantee that their individuality will hang about after they've developed into half a happy couple. By making it apparent that you don't expect some transformation, he'll feel like you really understand him and won't bully his sense of self. That leaves him enough ground to commit. The following moves let him know you're no ball and chain.

Share your own fears.
Men often hesitate because they think most chicks are baby-hungry ring-hunters. So if you feel nervous about committing, let him know. He'll be reassured that you're navigating new waters too, not trying to trap him.

Blow him off.
Single men detest the idea of being tied down socially, so turn down occasional plans. He'll not only feel easier -- and open up more -- around you, but he'll also start to wonder what you're doing and pursue you more.

Try reinventing yourself.
Little changes in your appearance now and then -- say, hair up in a ponytail one day, down the next, etc. -- remind him that you've got millions of facets to your personality too.

Value his privacy.
A physical space that's totally his is a huge symbol of independence to a man. Signal that you respect that by, say, staying out of desk drawers and not peeking at his caller ID when his phone rings.

Ensuring Fun at a Home Halloween Party

Having a good time on Halloween with costumes, decors, and trick-or-treating can be a lot amusing and cool for the entire family! Undoubtedly, you will see and maybe do things during Halloween that (fortunately) you will not see or do any other time of the year. However, children are likely to be injured from falling accidents on Halloween night four times more than any other night. improperly fitted costumes, masks that block vision and hearing, and children crowded together, pushing, in a hurry to get to the next house.
Everyone wants to have a safe and happy Halloween for themselves, their guests and their children. Using safety tips and common sense can help you make the most of your Halloween season and make it as enjoyable for your kids as it is for you! The excitement of children and adults at this time of year sometimes makes them forget to be careful. Simple common sense can do a lot to stop any tragedies from happening. Make Halloween a fun, safe and happy time for your kids and they'll carry on the tradition that you taught them to their own families some day! To ensure it remains fun for everyone, here are some suggestions to keep the celebration safe and healthy.

• Pre-plan for both your house and your kids. Costumes that are bright and reflective will reduce the tire marks from drivers not seeing ‘halloweeners.’ Use non-toxic, hypoallergenic makeup in place of full-faced masks to prevent vision and breathing problems. Wigs and costumes should also be flame-retardant. Too many children and adults end up in burn units from pranks and ill-suited costumes.
• Outdoor decorations can be really cool, but remember you will have children running across your yard. If you plan to be visited by extra-terrestials, goblins, monsters, royalty and superheroes, remember these children cannot actually fly. Unless, of course, they are flying over your yard stuff from not seeing them. Keep your decorations lit or in non-pedestrian areas (such as front lawns and culverts) to reduce potential lawsuits and prevent injuries. Other items you may not think of include flower pots, garden hoses, low tree limbs or roots, and other house and yard items.
• Find accessories for costumes that are flexible and soft. Knives, sticks, swords, and guns – even play ones – can pose life-threatening hazards if your child falls on them or gets him killed in some neighborhoods or business areas if the weapon looks real.
• For the main event, have a route or location already established. Many of the malls now offer a safe environment along with costume contests for children, as do other organizations. Make sure you have the right batteries for flashlights. Feed your children a good meal prior to going out to reduce the sugar-meal-syndrome when returning with all of their goodies.
• Act responsibly with your pets. Try not to put them outside or in a high visibility area. It not only scares the daylights out of the ‘weeners, but can make your pet more aggressive as it believes it is under attack by strange beings. Keeping your pet indoors will also reduce the risk of the pet being attacked or injured by someone.
• And finally, the basic list: warn your children about entering people’s homes or vehicles; do not let your kids use bicycles, roller blades, or skateboards; don’t let younger children go alone and, if possible, go in ‘herds’ or groups. That works well for the kids and the homeowners; don’t let your children eat anything that is not properly wrapped; only go to homes that have the outside or porch light on.

This is apparently an incomplete list. With computers around, you can rummage around the internet for “Halloween safety” for more tips and suggestions. Halloween can be real fun and exciting. Keeping it free from harm and damages for adults, children, and pets will afford an upbeat experience for everyone!

HOW TO BECOME A MOTIVATIONAL LEADER

Everyone has a passion in life. The launch is here. What makes you glance ahead to the next day? If you had the option of what you would prefer to do most, what would that be? Once you have identified what the catalyst is, that becomes the chief driver in your life. You can use this as a determinant to decide what to do in order to accomplish something.

That spiritual belief in yourself and your ability to prevail despite any circumstances is your motivation. It completely mobilizes all the senses, the skills, the mind and the spirit in a joyous union to accept and get through every overturn on the road to that eventual success. And then you look around you. With your imminent success, you begin to draw the attention of others. You realize that others need you and you need them too. It would be harder to travel the road without them so you decide to take them with you. You are now becoming a motivational leader and it will initially take seven(7) ways to be so.

Create a Big Vision
To become a motivational leader, you start with motivating yourself. You motivate yourself with a big vision, and as you move progressively toward its realization, you motivate and enthuse others to work with you to fulfill that vision.

Set High Standards
You exhibit absolute honesty and integrity with everyone in everything you do. You are the kind of person others admire and respect and want to be like. You set a standard that others aspire to. You live in truth with yourself and others so that they feel confident giving you their support and their commitment.

Face Your Fears
You demonstrate courage in everything you do by facing doubts and uncertainties and moving forward regardless. You put up a good front even when you feel anxious about the outcome. You don't burden others with your fears and misgivings. You keep them to yourself. You constantly push yourself out of your comfort zone and in the direction of your goals. And no matter how bleak the situation might appear, you keep on keeping on with a smile.

Be Realistic About Your Situation
You are intensely realistic. You refuse to engage in mental games or self-delusion. You encourage others to be realistic and objective about their situations as well. You encourage them to realize and appreciate that there is a price to pay for everything they want. They have weaknesses that they will have to overcome, and they have standards that they will have to meet, if they want to survive and thrive in a competitive market.

Accept Responsibility
You accept complete responsibility for results. You refuse to make excuses or blame others or hold grudges against people who you feel may have wronged you. You say, "If it's to be, it's up to me." You repeat over and over the words, "I am responsible. I am responsible. I am responsible."

Take Vigorous Action
Finally, you take action. You know that all mental preparation and character building is merely a prelude to action. It's not what you say but what you do that counts. The mark of the true leader is that he or she leads the action. He or she is willing to go first. He or she sets the example and acts as the role model. He or she does what he or she expects others to do.

Strive For Excellence
You become a motivational leader by motivating yourself. And you motivate yourself by striving toward excellence, by committing yourself to becoming everything you are capable of becoming. You motivate yourself by throwing your whole heart into doing your job in an excellent fashion. You motivate yourself and others by continually looking for ways to help others to improve their lives and achieve their goals. You become a motivational leader by becoming the kind of person others want to get behind and support in every way.

As the emerging leader of any organization, whether small or large, you should effectively be the captain of the ship. Your main job is to take complete control of your personal evolution and become a leader in every area of your life. You could ask for nothing more, and you should settle for nothing less. Whether it is your own life or the future of your family, you have the responsibility to ensure that you succeed so that those around you are able to benefit from what life has given us all - the gift within our own hands to succeed in our own terms.

Five Ways of Boosting Up Your Self-Esteem

Many people harbor negative self-image for a lot of reasons. There are those whose depressed images have been keeping them off the mark since childhood. With such low self-esteem, virtually every part of their lives, relationships, career and health are negatively affected.

Boosting one’s self-esteem is essentially a matter of transforming your views about oneself and one’s life. Cognitive behavior therapy techniques are especially helpful in changing unhealthy thinking and behavior patterns. Based on the idea that your feelings and behavior result from how you think about yourself and your life, these techniques can help you recognize, challenge and ultimately replace negative thoughts or inaccurate beliefs with more positive, realistic ones.

Based on cognitive behavior therapy principles, there are five steps toward achieving healthy self-esteem. As you undergo these five steps, keeping a record of your thoughts, experiences and observations in a journal may help you draw on these steps more successfully.

Recognize disturbing conditions or situations

Identify what conditions or situations about your life that you find disturbing and that seem to shrink your self-esteem. You may aspire to change aspects of your personality or behavior, such as a fear of doing something in front of people, frequently becoming angry or always expecting the worst. You may be besieged with depression, a disability or a change in life circumstances, such as the death of a loved one, a lost promotion or children leaving home. Or you may wish to improve your relationship with another person, such as a spouse, family member or co-worker.

Pay attention to beliefs and thoughts

Once you've recognized and acknowledged disturbing conditions or situations, become aware of your thoughts related to them. This includes your self-talk as well as your interpretation of what a situation means and your beliefs about yourself, other people and events. Your thoughts and beliefs may be positive, negative or neutral. They may be rational — based on reason or facts — or irrational — based on false ideas.

Identify unconstructive or erroneous thinking

Your beliefs and thoughts about a condition or situation affect your reaction to it. Unconstructive or erroneous thoughts and beliefs about something or someone can activate unhealthy physical, emotional and behavioral responses, including:

Physical responses, such as a stiff neck, sore back, racing heart, stomach problems, sweating or change in sleeping patterns.

Emotional responses, such as difficulty concentrating or feeling depressed, angry, sad, nervous, guilty or worried.

Behavioral responses, such as eating when not hungry, avoiding tasks, working more than usual, spending increased time alone, obsessing about a situation or blaming others for your problems.

Confront unconstructive or erroneous thinking

Your initial thoughts may not be the only possible way to view a situation. So test the accuracy of your thoughts. Ask yourself whether your view of a situation is consistent with facts and logic or whether there might be other explanations.

You may not easily recognize inaccuracies in your thinking. Most people have automatic, long-standing ways of thinking about their lives and themselves. These long-held thoughts and beliefs feel normal and factual to you, but many are simply opinions or perceptions.

These kinds of thought patterns tend to erode self-esteem:

All-or-nothing thinking. You see things as either all good or all bad. For example, "If I don't succeed in this job, I'm a total failure."

Mental filtering. You see only negatives and dwell on them, distorting your view of a person or situation or your entire life. For example, "I made a mistake on that report and now everyone will realize I'm a failure."

Converting positives into negatives. You reject your achievements and other positive experiences by insisting that they don't count. For example, "My date only gave me that compliment because he knows how bad I feel." "I only did well on that test because it was so easy."

Jumping to negative conclusions. You reach a negative conclusion when little or no evidence supports it. For example, "My friend hasn't replied to my e-mail, so I must have done something to make her angry."

Mistaking feelings for facts. You confuse feelings or beliefs with facts. For example, "I feel like a failure, so I must be a failure." No matter how strong a feeling is, it isn't a fact.

Self put-downs. You undervalue yourself, put yourself down or use self-deprecating humor. This can result from overreacting to a situation, such as making a mistake. For example, "I don't deserve anything better." "I'm weak, stupid or ugly."

Modify your thoughts and beliefs

The final step is to replace or change the negative or inaccurate thinking you've identified with accurate thoughts and beliefs. This enables you to discover helpful ways to muddle through and give your self-esteem a boost.

This step can be difficult. Thoughts often occur spontaneously or automatically, without effort on your part. It can be hard to control or turn off your thoughts. Thoughts can be very powerful and aren't always based on logic. It takes time and effort to learn how to recognize and replace distressing thoughts with accurate ones.

These strategies may help you approach situations in a healthy way:

Use hopeful statements. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Pessimism can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. That is, if you think your presentation isn't going to go well, you may indeed stumble through it. Try telling yourself things such as, "Even though it's tough, I can handle this situation."

Forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes aren't permanent reflections on you as a person. They are isolated moments in time. Tell yourself, "I made a mistake but that doesn't make me a bad person."

Avoid 'should' and 'must' statements. If you find that your thoughts are full of these words, you may be setting unreasonable demands on yourself — or others. Removing these words from your self-talk can give you and others more realistic expectations.

Focus on the positive. Think about the good parts of your life. Ask yourself, "What other things have gone well recently?" "What personal skills do I have that have helped me cope with challenging situations in the past?"

Relabel upsetting thoughts. Having negative thoughts doesn't mean you must choose to react negatively. Instead, think of them as signals to use new, healthy thinking patterns. Ask yourself, "Which of my strengths can help me respond in a constructive way?" "What can I think and do to make this less stressful?"

Encourage yourself. Give yourself credit for making positive changes. Treat yourself as well as you'd treat a loved one. Tell yourself, "I did a good job on the presentation. It may not have been perfect, but my colleagues said it was good."

Living out in practice, these steps may come more effortlessly to you. You'll be better able to recognize the thoughts and beliefs that are contributing to your low self-esteem. Since self-esteem can ebb and flow over time, you may want to repeat these steps, especially if you begin to feel down on yourself again. Keeping a journal or daily log can help you trace trouble spots over time.

Achieving a balanced, accurate view of yourself and accepting your value as a human being may help you feel happier and more confident. And that may affect or influence others, too, including your family or friends or co-workers.

The Relevance of Play

Play is naturally pleasing for children. Since it is their dynamic engagement in things that fascinate them, play should be child-oriented, or at least child-enthused, for it to remain relevant and significant to them. Children at play are happily lost in themselves; they are in their own realm of wonder, discovery, and adventure, pulling parents in at times with a frequent “Let’s play, mom!” as an open invitation into their world.

Even during infancy, children plunge themselves in play activities with the intention of making sense of the world around them. Play offers children the prospect to learn and be familiar witrh things themselves, which is crucial for their growth. Although peek-a-boo games seem meaningless to grown-ups, toddlers are impressed by the revelation that awaits them as they see the gradually emerging faces of people they care for.

Why the big story on play? Now the child benefits in a way that is a little bit thorny for adults to see.

· Play hones physical and motor development. Play often involves the use of the senses, the body, and the extremities. When children play, they exercise their bodies for physical strength, fluidity of movement, balance and coordination.

· Play enhances language development. Toddlers who are still grappling with words need to be immersed in oral language so they can imitate what they hear. They benefit from songs and rhymes that provide the basis for understanding how language works.

· Play facilitates cognitive learning. Play is vital to the intellectual development of a child. We live in a symbolic world in which people need to decode words, actions, and numbers. Through play, the child is constructing his or her worldview by constantly working and reworking his understanding of concepts.

· Play fosters socio-emotional learning. Kids deal with their confidence as they choose to embark on their play activities. At the same time, they are displaying their independence in the decisions that they make. Children are also internalizing social rules in their respective play situations.

· Play encourages creativity. Play opens an entire avenue for children to express themselves, show what they know and how they feel, and to create their own masterpieces.

· Play brings pure and utter joy. Kids remember a feeling of genuine joy that is captured in this four-letter word.

· Play provides bonding opportunities. Play provides for interaction, experimentation, and moral development. Parents should find ways to encourage and support their children’s playtime.

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